A Failed Channelling

A week ago I was in Portland for the Portland Marathon. I was ill-prepared, due to too much weight and too little training, so I was looking for any extra edge I could find. Since I was in Oregon, I turned to Oregon's own Steve Prefontaine for strength. Being short on hair, I turned to what I had left--the stache.

Well, let me just tell you, that channelling Pre through a mustache doesn't work. I crossed the finish line, but without style and without energy. Okay, the stache had some style, but it also scared children and repulsed women. I shaved it off upon arriving back at the hotel. Even with this failed channelling, I still think it was a good idea. If nothing else, it was a chance to sport a ridiculous mustache in a place where nobody knew me. I don't know when I will try to channel powers again, but you can bet you're going to be reading more about mustaches sometime in the future.